My baking sucks

I'm starting to think that my baking sucks. I mean i've tried out some recipes and they tasted pretty good, like the chocolate chip cookies and apple crumble. But honestly, other than those two, the things that i've baked on my own really didn't turn out all that great. I like baking, it's kind of a passion/hobby of mine, but something always goes wrong.

So tonight I decided to bake brownies for my friends for Christmas. I literally went out just to buy baking powder because I mistakenly thought that I had baking powder at home when it was actually baking soda. They are two different things so I was like "nah, i'm not gonna screw up the recipe this time round". See my dedication here?

Anyway I think I overestimated myself and made 2 portions, because like I mentioned earlier I was planning to give them to my friends around 5-7 of them. But the end product turned out too crumbly and dry, and it wasn't sweet enough. This is probably because I didn't follow the recipe accordingly. I used a much lesser amount of chocolate, and the chocolate was unsweetened when the recipe's one was semi-sweetened. My mum said it's okay so I thought it would turn out fine. I added >50g of sugar to compensate for the chocolate, but it didn't help much. Sigh, then my mum kept reassuring me by saying, "it's not that bad, it's nice. I'll eat it for breakfast tomorrow." The more she said it, the more I thought she was trying to make me feel better. I mean my brownies weren't that much of a failure, it's just a moderate pass, but much improvement could be made.

Let me share with you my other baking failures haha. So one time I saw Byron's instructional video of the cookie cup and it looked super cute and appealing so I decided to be ambitious and tried his recipe out. Turns out somehow, I couldn't even get the cookies out of the cup. It failed so miserably and I left the two cups in the fridge because I didn't know what to do with it. Next day, my dad threw them away without even asking. He threw the cups away! Thank God they were free cups.

Another time, (which was quite recent, it was during my previous holidays), I wanted to bake these mother-in-law tongues which I found from my dad's recipe book. It's a cookie shaped like a pringle. And I thought, hey if this turns out successful I can post it on instagram. Turned out to be a total disaster. It tasted like cake instead and I'm not even joking. The batter was stuck to my parchment paper and I couldn't get it out! Unfortunately I wasted my parents' money on the ingredients and my time put into baking and washing up. The recipe was way too vague and adding my limited baking skills and knowledge = *_*

The more I write this post, the more depressed I get. But yes, I read that baking is like a science or an art, and it's kind of like trial and error. My dad says sometimes you can't get it right on the first try. I'm not gonna give up on baking I can assure you! I'll fill this blog of hopefully successful bakes! x

Holidays make me happy

Holidays equals to doing things that you like, things that make you happy. As for me, it equates to baking, binge watching Korean dramas (that is if I discover interesting ones), reading books, visiting cafes, exploring new places in Singapore and i'm definitely planning to visit the National Gallery which looks absolutely beautiful. I love any building that resembles those European architecture that looks ancient yet visually appealing. I think my (future) camera would be in love!!! Currently saving up for the Canon 100D but my progress is kinda going nowhere at the moment, clearly can't wait to use it when I travel overseas next year!

Today, I went to Awfully Chocolate with Chao Lei this afternoon to satisfy my iced mocha craving, which I tried the previous time I went with Wei Ling and it tasted heavenly, even better than Starbucks/any other mocha i've drunk before! Not lying, I promise. We started on our SIP reflection journals and we kept getting distracted and chatted non-stop. So much for getting things done but like they say, the first step to overcome procrastination is to start easy (or just start somewhere). #sourceunknown #probablyfromme

Spent the evening with Wei Ling, Si Rui, Lin Ying and Vivien at Jcube and had my sesame udon noodles at Itacho Sushi which wasn't even filling. Need to stop spending on food, someone remind me please. It wasn't really a bible study session, more of a shopping session for Wei Ling haha!

Still can't believe that 2015 is ending so soon. Reminds me of the faith goals and regular new year goals i've set to achieve for the year but some failed miserably... I'm also planning to restart on my #100daysofproductivity challenge, which originated from Tumblr. The general idea is to make sure that everyday you do something — anything productive. It embraces the concept that by chipping away at least a little bit of that big pile of work we all have everyday, we can make huge changes for the future. 

Felt motivated and inspired after scrolling past some posts of it and thus, i've created a blog specially meant for that. (Link here) Hopefully, the challenge is a way to develop my self-discipline to literally do anything like go for a jog, cook something healthy, read newspapers, bring my dog out, make some study notes, do household chores, study a chapter or two for my exams, instead of stagnating at home watching Youtube videos incessantly. I believe that it's a choice (or even a struggle) everyday to choose between being productive or wasting the day off. And this challenge will get me started and avoid procrastination. 

I'll update you on the progress! xxx

Fulfilling week

Holidays are coming to an end unfortunately, but i'm trying my best to be optimistic. This week has been pretty fulfilling!

Went to Fairprice Xtra with my mum and dad on Monday. Grocery shopping with my parents makes me feel happy. You can just grab your favourite snacks off the shelves and they will most likely pay for it. Haha i'm just kidding but it's the company that makes the whole trip worthwhile! I wanted to bake almond cookies called "mother-in-law tongues" found in my dad's recipe book (what a cute and quirky name) but being an amateur, the whole thing was disastrous. Threw away almost everything which made my heart break a bit because we specially went to Cold Storage to get some extra ingredients. This totally reminds me of my failed cookie cups. However the recipe was pretty vague haha and I kinda added the baking powder at the last minute. #tryingtovalidatemyfailure

Half of Tuesday was spent with Doris in school. Had mcdonalds and did some catching up! Apparently FC4 Koufu relocated to the new building. So not ready for school to start. #helpme

Wednesday was spent baking again! Baked chocolate chip cookies and the recipe was straightforward and simple and I used it before. Was my 2nd attempt baking alone and I had music playing. Was so fun baking alone! It's really comforting and relaxing. Gonna do this again sometime when i'm free. I get happy really easily, but it's the same as the opposite. Took me about 3 hours in total then I headed to the gym to accompany my sis! Was surprisingly crowded and I don't know why but I felt pretty intimated by the guys in the gym.

Today my parents and I brought Boy to Pet Lovers for his much-needed grooming session! The weather was unbearable and the pavement was too hot for his paws so we took turns to carry him home. Carrying him can really gain you muscles because he's a whopping 10kg heavy! Plus my body was already aching from gym yesterday. #imsuchagooddogowner

Had brunch at East Manhattan which was located nearby! Was pretty pricey. Food was average. But ambience was pretty cozy!

Really appreciate spending quality time with them, they make me happy. I usually don't plan anything with my friends on Mondays and Thursdays unless it's school related because it's the only time they are available and free from work! 

See you guys in a bit! x

Had a picnic at night at Vivo rooftop with some of the cell girls: Si Rui, Eunice, Vivien, Lin Ying and Wei Ling. Haven't been attending cell as of late so I was kinda clueless as to what was going on with the cell etc. Anyway I managed to make cocktail sausages and bacon skewers! Kinda time consuming but I somehow like making food. It makes me happy. (If it tastes nice haha) but somehow I feel like no matter how bad the food that I cook tastes, I don't mind finishing it all up. We updated each other on our recent happenings and talked about the cell group. 

Also, happy (belated) 18th birthday to my bff Si Rui!!!! Thank God for you! So glad that I'm comfortable to share almost anything that's troubling/upsetting me and also share my happy moments with you. We're in this together, don't forget that! 

It's so funny how she wanted to get the latest White magazine in Kinokuniya and obviously I couldn't buy it in front of her for her birthday present so I had to go another day just to get it. And I was finding excuses so that she wouldn't buy it before I do. I said things like "hey it's expensive, it's not worth your money. Don't buy it!" My dissuasion worked! #amiagoodfriendorwhat #noireallyam

Also helped my sis out with her flea market preparation last weekend. Gosh I don't know how she managed to buy so many clothes, so much so that we had to stuff it into 2 huge luggages and 2 bags and lugged it into a cab and then to Lucky Plaza. The customers were 95% maids and the whole place was like a pasar malam and everything sold was super cheap like $1/$2/$4. But some of them could still bargain and ask for discounts when the prices were already ridiculously cheap. 

Another update to share with you is that I was recently watching a Korean drama called "Birth of a Beauty" for the past week and my mum joined in and watched like around 5/more episodes with me. Note that she chose to watch it, I didn't make her do it. Haha I find it really cute though. Didn't expect her to be interested in these kind of shows. I can imagine her in a couple of years after retirement on a Korean drama marathon, bringing Boy for frequent walks, hanging out with Huan Yiyi, and accompanying my dad with his trusty old camera to take pictures. 

Tomorrow I'll be going to Woodlands to visit King Kong (not the 25 ft tall gorilla you see in the theaters aha, but Chao Lei's poodle) with Doris, Wei Yun and Tricia! Hope that it will be a fulfilling day. Gotta make the most out of my remaining holidays. 

To those people who make plans and then cancel on you at the last minute

You're really inconsiderate.

Knowing that we have already agreed to fork out time and that time is reserved to let's say have a meal together, and that prohibits me from making other plans. Do you not realise that i've worked my schedule around meeting up with you? And perhaps on the day before our supposed meet-up, you decide to flake out just because you want to sleep in/watch your favourite TV series/you don't feel like you're up to it/whatever excuses you come up with.

 

Do you think it's really fair? 

Of course I wouldn't mind if you've a reasonable excuse like something urgent you've to attend to e.g.  visiting a family member at the hospital. But other than that, you're just being really selfish when the other party has already invested time to making these plans which they look forward to, just to have you bail out on them with a crappy excuse. 

The most you can do is give an early notice that you won't be able to make it and postpone the plans. Ensure you have plenty of rest the day before and please just honour people's invitations. 

Appearance

Have you ever looked into the mirror and you do not like what you see?

I do. I do all the time. 

Considering what the media portrays how unrealistic girls should look like to be deemed attractive — a thigh gap, a concave stomach, toned arms, v-cut abs and a narrow hip, and all? These "ideal" beauty standards have been subconciously ingrained in us ever since we were little kids playing with Barbie dolls and watching Disney movies and also through advertisements, magazines and fashion shows. 

To prove my point, do you ever realise how Disney princesses have huge eyes, similar neck and waist widths, extremely long necks, and unimaginably tiny wrists? Unless you're genetically blessed, achieving such beauty standards are actually quite impossible. They give children a false impression that you are only beautiful if you look a certain way. I do love Disney, but this is something that needs to be improved on or there will be repercussions.

You can read more on this link: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/10/30/disney-princess-real-waistline_n_6076634.html

Photoshop, digital alteration, and image manipulation also contribute largely to the flawless figures you see in music videos and magazine covers. They are drastically altered to sell fantasy, to feed their consumers with their definition of how a "perfect" woman looks like. I don't mean that photoshop shouldn't be used, obviously touching up and removing a blemish like maybe a pimple or an acne is fine, but unrealistic editing is not okay. Impressionable children and adolescents at such a young age are often still figuring out who they are, and they are easily swayed by things like the media. They can end up loathing their appearances and even develop self-esteem issues and eating disorders etc if these problems aren't dealt with properly. 

Victoria Secret also launched an advertising campaign recently, using a very controversial slogan as you can see from below.

After a petition on change.org which garnered more than 27,000 signatures, VS changed their slogan to this: 

When in fact, I wish advertisements could include more diversity and look like this:

Even mannequins are shockingly thin.

Like what even?

I have struggled with this issue for so long, of not accepting my appearance and loving myself for how I look. It's really difficult given the expectations that society upholds and perpetuates.  I still get self-conscious, I do compare myself with others and wish I could look more like them. But i'm still in the process of embracing my flaws and imperfections, and loving my own appearance because no one is perfect. God made you to be how you look like right now. You are beautiful in His eyes and nothing will ever change that. Be yourself. 

Love this Roald Dahl quote so much!

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." Psalms 139:13-14 

3 weeks of holidays left and it's got me feeling rather nonchalant. I wish time would slow down though. Have been helping my parents out at the store pretty often, every weekend night and going down really opened my eyes and made me realise how tough it really is to work in not the best environment where you normally have the AC running, having to eat your meals late, and feeling all sweaty and oily after work. #colbiecaillatreference I used to help out in secondary school but I only did the serving and taking of orders and other miscellaneous duties, but now since we've shifted to Taman Jurong, i've to help out with closing as well and it definitely isn't easy. So guys, do appreciate your parents for their dedication and hard work to putting food on the table. 

Also, after a few years of telling my parents that I would like to treat them to Starbucks, I finally had an opportunity to! (my mum only though) but I love the feeling of giving to others, it's really satisfactory. 

Spent my holidays editing my sister's Japan videos. 2/4 done. Here's the first: Tokyo!

Till next time! x